The Waiting

Two days ago I typed in my Facebook status. "Tari Turnbow the waiting is the hardest part". As I typed it, I sang the wonderful Tom Petty song. I smiled even though I didn't feel like smiling. The next day a good friend from what feels like a past life (miss you, Monte) commented: "waiting for what" I almost didn't reply, it could be taken as a rhetorical question. The person who left the comment wouldn't get all chapped had I not replied. But I started typing anyway. I knew as soon as I started, too much was gonna come out. I realized much of my life has been spent waiting. I don't mean literally waiting in line for the movies, or a concert. But really just waiting for the next thing that is supposed to happen, happen. I don't want to get into too much detail, and make this WAY too personal, but I don't want to wait for things to happen anymore.

I want to make things happen. I want to do things.

That's a big reason why we moved to Germany. Looking back, that's also a big reason why we moved to Utah. I have to change my outlook on life. Life is not waiting around for things to be marked complete. I want to live more for now, and today and probably tomorrow and a little of next week. But I won't wait around for next month when our belongings get here...and feel like then we can start enjoying our time here. We are here!! Nothing alters that. Yeah, things are still temporary feeling. Sleeping on borrowed beds, using borrowed dinning set, couch, etc. Its weird, but only as weird as we make it. Its good to always have something to look forward to, but not if it hampers what you are doing right now.

Whoa, I feel so inspirational. :)

I don't know who said this quote. I read it for the first time on my Mom's FB profile. Isn't it ironic?

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...
It's about learning to dance in the rain"

This was the week we initially planned to move into our house...Most of our plans are made only to be changed. (I wrote this late last week but it didn't get posted then)

We have no furniture.

We have no belongings other than what we brought with us on the plane which seemed like way too much in the beginning...thankfully we have it!

We have some random things we mailed to ourselves or had shipped early. The belongings that were shipped early were taken the second week of May. In hindsight I wish I had packed more stuff but I didn't want to go the last month of living in Utah w/o certain household necessities.

I recall Paul telling me people at work told him to pack bedding, some pots/pans, etc. Neither of us could figure out why. Now we know...a little late in the game I'd say.
So we will be staying in our beautiful hotel for one more week(actually, until Saturday). I'm not complaining...yet.

We will be getting temporary beds and furniture from the FMO (Furnishings Management Office). This is a great service for people in our situation, clearly there are many. I'm not too jived about sleeping on a bed that is considered "temporary" and has been "temporary" for god knows how many other people. But I have been sleeping on a hotel bed for 5 weeks.

Random question: Why don't they have fitted sheets here?




Here is the front of the house. I'm excited to be a country girl. Our view from the deck. I think it faces south.
Another random question: Why don't highway signs have direction of travel on them? This last question is wreaking havoc on my attempts to get familiar with the area.


This is the BIK (built-in-kitchen). Kitchens are designed for people to take the furnishings with them when they move.

The house is a renovated stone barn. I don't know the age of the original building, but it is old. Hopefully that doesn't mean cold in the winter. The main heat source is oil! It actually burns oil in the winter to run the heaters. I am NOT used to this at all. There are 3 huge oil tanks in a poorly-ventilated room just off the laundry room. Its just sittining there waiting to be ignited by a freak spark of electricity. The house has a constant faint smell of oil. New rule of the house: Laundry room MUST stay closed :) Otherwise I feel we will succumb to the noxious fumes.The oil tanks are actually pretty commonplace here. Many older homes use oil for heat, especially those homes in smaller towns. We looked at a few places that had oil tanks in the basement.


The fireplace just to the right of where I am standing when I took the picture above. (I was standing the the stairs in top photo) That should help with heat.

Breakin' the Law

I have seen this sign every day for 4 weeks. It is located on a trail head near our hotel. I wondered what it meant. There were guesses: "caution, birds of prey", "nature ahead", honestly, I had no idea what this 17 letter word was trying to tell me. So I remained ignorant and continued to walk by it thinking, "What is is trying to tell me?" But, because ignorance is generally not my style, I took a pic of it and brought it back to the hotel room. I pulled up google translate and typed it in. Nature Reserve. Hmm. I know the laws of US nature reserves. I realized I have likely broken German law. I do not want to do this...
The baby toads have to go free. I spoke with the kids about it, they were fine with letting them go. I was more attached to them than they were! But it was OK, I didn't want tears or regret. So the Schwarzwald toads are back in the Schwarzwald. We only kept them for a few days. I was worried they weren't getting enough to eat. As I stated before, I didn't want to be the cause of their demise ;) Nevermind how small and thin they were when we released them...hopefully they didn't fall prey to the gigantic beetles or the abominable ant colonies. I will post pics of the 1 meter (yay, metric system) high ant hills.

Toadie

On one of our hikes we saw a toad who had been in a scuffle with something. He was pretty beat up. He was missing an eye and had a small bleeding wound on his nose. Me being me, I wanted to take him home and nurse him back to health. We had nothing to keep it in and no one wanted to carry it back to the hotel. Will asked, "Can I kick him?" I was horrified, but chalked it up to boys being boys and just said, "No, baby. Let's leave him alone." I took pics, I was gonna post them until when we got back Will started crying about "Toadie". Paul ran back up the trail with a bag, he was gonna bring the toad back. We made up a box with leaves, moss, bark, etc. Toadie wasn't found.

Will was sad all evening about it. He didn't want Toadie to be eaten or die. I did my best to console him and teach him the ways of nature. I said, "If we were meant to have him, we would. He and the forest are better off with him where he is, where ever that may be." I don't know how much better he felt. But I could identify with what he was feeling. I recall feeling such guilt fishing with my dad. "That fish would still be alive if I hadn't caught him!! (tears)" "Dad! Stop hitting it with a rock!! ITS STILL BREATHING!" I recall my brother bringing a small perch home from Sweet Briar because he couldn't bear to think what would happen to him after the fishing hook poked through its eye (or something equally lethal).

The next day I found a baby toad hoping along the trail we were hiking on. We were very close to the hotel and the box we made for Toadie was still made up. So, you guessed it...I carried it back. Then a few hours later, after swimming at the beach, Baile found another baby toad. How in one day we see two toads when we hadn't seen any prior is ironic...or not. Ask Alanis about irony :)

So now we have two baby toads. They are named TB (b/c he looks like tree bark) and Joey. I don't know what baby toads eat. I hope we figure it out soon. I can't be the cause of the demise of two could-be toads from the Black Forest :) Here is a pic of them in their new habitat.

Nature abound....hallelujah

Just gonna post some pics of the beauty around us:

I get to walk through this every morning!



View of the Schwarzwald (Black Forest) from the top of a semi-strenuous hike. My favorite trail by far.








Same trail....ah.






To get lost in the trees would not be difficult!















My favorite place to hike thus far!

Living in a hotel.

We have been living in this hotel for almost a month. It is beautiful, and large...not a typical hotel room. As I explained before, Paul & I have our own bedroom. There is a small kitchen/dining area with 2 burner stove, small fridge and sink. There is a hide-a-bed sofa in the living area. This is where the kids typically would sleep. We aren't typical, however :)

The kids slept together for 3 nights. Each night consisted of yelling, tattling, hitting, kicking...get the picture? Three nights.

On the fourth night, Will wanted to sleep alone. I jokingly explained the only other bed in the apartment was in the baby bed in the storage closet. He took my joke as a friendly and helpful suggestion, said "OK!" and promptly got up and crawled into the play pen. So this has become his "room". He sleeps in the playpen....is this OK? He is 8 years old.
I wanted say, "There is no reason at 8 and 11 you guys can't sleep in the same bed without killing each other."

But I paused, and thought back to me and my siblings.

I'm pretty sure we slept in the same bed while on trips. We were never expected to do it for an extended period of time. So, I digressed and let my 8 year old sleep in a storage closet in a play pen. I haven't had to be a referee at bedtime since. I haven't had to force Will to sleep in the playpen, it has continued to be his choice and he prefers it. I guess I shouldn't complain ;)

Move in date is coming up. July 13th we will be leaving the hotel. *SIGH* Finally. I have been going ape shit crazy for the last 3 weeks having to live in such close quarters. The kids fight, get bored, want to go home, etc. So I thought I would be dying to get out of here. The opposite seems to be true. I feel like this will always be a special place. Natural water recreation, trees, trails, nature....so many things I love. I'm really gonna miss living here. Hiking through the Black Forest is so peaceful, and beautiful and rewarding. The balcony overlooking a small lake is awesome. I listen to the fish jumping at night. A few nights ago I watched fog roll in from the forest over the lake.....breathtaking.
















The top photo was shot at 22:10, the next was 13 minutes later. Cheap thrills for this one. I have never seen fog overtake an area. It was absolutely breathtaking. I don't want to leave :) Paul made a wonderful observation last night at dinner....this will be our special place. Forever.

All the ape shit craziness aside, all the bored and cuped up kid fights behind me....I will miss this place. It was exactly what I needed to enjoy and love moving here. If not for the beauty of the Nature that surrounds us, I would've wandered into the Black Forest (w/o a GPS) never to return.